The Inevitable End may be the very Beginning

I remember being in turmoil, choosing the right silk for my dress. Oh yes! A marriage is in my schedule (the hideous diary, as my mom calls it). Being the cousin that says "nah" when Indian marriages are discussed, my agreement to visit the tailor was quite a big deal. Well as much as the word "marriage" is concerned, I never possessed a fondness for it. Not when I didn't have good examples around me. No! I don't hate marriages, and no! I am not against anyone marrying. Its the cost of one's own self that makes me question this institution.

"A wedding? What is it? Is it something to wait for? A necessity perhaps.", the 11 year-old, too mature for her age, asking numerous questions to her mom, while answering for herself, I was a rather curious child. "No honey, its not a necessity, but it is something people expect from you", "Which people Mom?" , "The society", " Who would this society be?", She laughs heartily.

I still remember that half- hearted laugh. I could sense the pain behind it. I am still unsure of who this society is, or what marriage is actually meant to be, but what I am sure of is, that

Even the happily married people have concerns they cannot digest.

So technically, it's not a necessity, It is a choice. It can not be a new beginning, as people call it, for new beginnings come with no burdens. A new beginning isn't about bounding yourself or losing your sense of freedom. It does have it's burdens, but they should not be entirely burdens, but a fruitful struggle. A new beginning shouldn't have the burden of a perfect ending, it should be your key to freedom.

That is why I call marriage an inevitable end that can remain an end for people who didn't find love in it. But for those, fortunate enough, to have someone genuinely looking after them, this inevitable end maybe their very own new beginning. Something they handle with delicate hands, care and utmost love.

Isn't everything about love in the end? Love, doesn't it make every End look like a New Beginning?

and when the stars stop aligning

when the storms stop waking me up

when the world is on the brink of ending

when the wind stops blowing

when the love stops showing

when they fight to live

when they crawl to give

and when everything seems wrong

Let me be your right

Let me align your planets

Let me be the rain that shatters upon your shelter

The heat that swelters your skin

The wind that cools you off

The warrior that fights for you

Your strong will

Your biggest success

and the beginning of your very end.

Let me be the love, you never had.

-Mehreen

"Society is that friend that is jealous from you, darling, stay away from them", mom said after a final huff. And maybe, maybe for one instant, I wanted to meet this society person and make them jealous from me, for envy is the biggest sin but a great pleasure to see someone possess it for you ;)